2 months passed.

It's hard to believe it's been already 2 months since Daddy passed.

I even don't know how to describe to lose someone who gave me so much impact for my life. I know Daddy for almost 10 years now. Then, being with him for 4 years. It was intense, seems short yet it seems very valuable period time for my life.
I have had so many feelings in my head.
Was I good enough to understand him?
Did I really understand what he was trying to teach me?
Was I good partner/soul mate for/of him?

I have cried so many times like I have ever cried before.
Last night I was looking at my cellphone the text messages I exchanged with him before he passed. I wish I knew better.

After memorials were over.
I found a new friend, who is my neighbor from my building who has been visiting me often as almost everyday since Daddy passed.
She is from Central America, Ms. Sharon. We found out that her birthday was a day after mine. Since then we hit off in many different and great ways.
I met her in the laundry room while ago. Then I explained to her about my profession as a Massage Therapy. Then I took her home to do some sample of my massage which she really enjoyed it.
When she walked into the apartment, she saw Daddy for the second time. She said "I knew you". Daddy was the first person she met from the building after she moved in.
Since then whenever we saw her, we greeted each other with a big smile. She saw us going out with a shopping cart. She knew where we were going which is Key Food Super Market. Yeah, she loved and respect us.

Then, the day Daddy passed she stopped by with another neighbor. She gave me a big hug for a while and cried for me and Daddy. After that she started to come to visit me almost every single day.

More I got to know her. I felt comfortable enough to tell her what I do on the side as an amateur porn girl. She was cool about it.
We talk, laugh, smoke, chant and cry together since then. I have shared her so many things about the life I had with Daddy, my childhood, my children etc.
She also has shared me so much things of her life. I can tell she really cares about me. And I do care about her as well.

One day we were laughing so hard after we smoked. And I realized that I might have video clip of Daddy in my iPod. So, I showed it to her.
The short video clip was taken on my birthday two years ago. We had a swing party, Big Max was standing right next me and friends were singing "happy birthday" song for me.
After the song was over, Daddy walked up to me and we had a passionate kiss as we were holding each other tight. Daddy was always holding me from back like he's making sure I was/am protected. I have many photos of him holding me from back really tight.
As soon as I saw Daddy from the clip, I started to cry in front of her and couldn't stop for a while. She cried with me, too.
I am sure that she is an angel Daddy sent to me. She is a very intelligence, caring, loving with full of energy. If you meet her once, you would never forget her.

I feel like I have met soul-mate sister. Without Ms. Sharon, I won't be able to stand alone right now. I would have cried much much more, Because I am alone. But I am not lonely.

There are more people who have been taking care of me in many aspects.
Susan, Brandon, Big Max, Kat, str8 friends, Buddhist and swinger friends, my family and friends and fans. I can't even put all names.

Thank you all for everything. Without you, I won't be able to survive from the greatest sadness.

Nam-myoho-Renge-kyo X 3

momo

www.daddyspetslut.com

Had a nice weekend..

My weekend has been mostly working for private clients. Recently I had met some people who works for UN as well as people from Jamaica Queens. I feel so lucky to know that people now recognize my massage work.

Oct 25th Sunday at 2 pm. I had some gathering for Daddy. Because I can't go to visit friends. I don't have time for it. Also I have people who want to meet me. Anyway, it was a nice to see many friends. Thank you.
I am feeling better little by little.

As matter of fact, I have started to have sex. Yes, I have. Sex has been making me feel so good about myself. Sex makes me feel so sexy and beautiful. It's sexual healing you may call it.
I am thankful to have my friends who share it with me.

http://www.daddyspetslut.com

momo

6 weeks already...

I don't want to post sad news all the time.
I have been working more hours for my massage work lately. More I work, people would come to me for more massage. Some people have noticed how special my skill are.
Since Daddy's passing. I have been fortunate enough to meet many people from many firms, indeed. I am so happy about it, too.

Today I got a new lovebird. I don't know if it's him or her. Because I don't know my bird is female or male either. Because I have been working a lot. When I come home, my lovebird always welcomed me with a big smile. But I can tell she has been lonely. Because she lost her friend my Daddy.

It was bit scary at the beginning. But in one hour so, I saw them cleaning up each other. Kissing each other. My lovebird even tried to hump new friend. They aren't screaming or biting each other. I guess it was meant to be each other. Watching them taking care of each other made me cry a bit. But it was a good decision to make.
It's nice to see both strangers getting along. Even they never met each other before.

My girlfriend even picked the bird with me. She is such a beautiful lady. She is my sister from another mother.

Anyway, hope you will have a wonderful week for work, life, love, whatever... :-)
I am gonna try to have a good week for myself as well

xoxo

momo

New Journey has begun

Hello Everyone.

I hope everyone is doing well and enjoying harvest season.

I just want to let you know that I am doing well. Yes, My work has been growing slowly with confidence and actual proof of the benefits from my treatment. I am so pleased to tell you that people love my work. The words have been spreading to the world.


Everyday I talk to Daddy and let him know I love him.
Everyday I feel his big arms around me, so I feel safe.
Everyday I see him whenever I need, so I won't be lonely.
I still cry every single day. Because I miss him.

Daddy was the greatest man on the planet.
Daddy was everything to me.
Daddy was the one who raised me with confidence.
Daddy understood me than anyone else on the planet.
Daddy loved me so much than anyone else.

I got to be strong and stand alone. I miss him dearly. But his words and love sure made me strong.

Thank you so much for everyone.

It's almost 4 weeks since Daddy passed.
I am mourning for loss of my soul mate Daddy everyday.
But I thought I would need to write my blog. Because I truly appreciate prayer and love I have received since September 6th.

Daddy was one of the greatest human kind I have ever encountered. He was a greatest man I ever had in my life. He always made sure I am safe, happy and fulfilled everyday.

I have met so many people last 4 weeks. Everyone said "He always helped me to pursuit my dream. That's why I am here now". He was always great to help others.

Just like when I had nothing with me, he took me into his life completely. He suggested me to go to school for massage. He encouraged me to believe in myself. He showed me the confidence I didn't have it before. He never complained that I wasn't at home, because I was busy for studying and practice massage at the school.
When I was home, he would make sure I would be able to relax and rest. So, I won't get sick. He was so happy that when I passed the NY State boarding exam for massage therapy this year.

What we enjoyed together was simple. Going to groceries shopping with a shopping cart, cooking at home and eat together, sharing a cake and ice cream together.
We didn't ask anything expensive for our birthday, nor Christmas.
Last 3 years whenever I asked him what he wanted for Christmas, he said "No. Don't need anything. You are my Christmas present". So we had a nice dinner for both of us. It was good enough for us.

I am still adjusting the fact not to see him in the balcony when I leave home for work and when I come home from work. I miss touching his bald head every morning when I go to work. I miss having him by my side when I go to bed every night. I miss feeling his big hands on my face. I miss feeling his lips on mine.

More I think about him how lucky I was/am to have him as a life partner, even it's just 3 years and half. We were like we had been and would have been together forever.
I remember many great things we had shared together. But it also made me cry, too.

I see Daddy in me from what I do. I feel Daddy wherever I go.

Now whenever I feel sad and lonely, he would send me someone so I won't be sad 24/7. It's like the movie "P.S I love you". Whenever I get phone call, emails or text message from the friends and family. I can hear Daddy saying "I love you, Bitch. Don't forget that."

I love you, Daddy..

I will continue write about him.
Hopefully I would be able to explore the lifestyle Daddy and I shared together. Includes video/photo shoots. I know he wants me to enjoy my life. Because he will always there with me.


momo

Memorial

Thank you so much for all your love and support.
Brandon from Brandonlongwood.com designed this site to honor Daddy's life.



http://sanasicreative.com/memorial/


All the best


momo

Rest In Peace

Daddy passed away at home in his bed by my side Sunday morning. He was gone while he was sleeping.

Thank you so much for your love and your support.

I miss him so much.


momo